Thursday, December 13, 2007

1.86.3 C. Trial by Jury/Realm of the Muse

The Waiting Game

It's an experience I never want to repeat, not just because of the mistakes that led to the worsening of Curtis Ames' condition, but for having to try and defend what I do to a group of people who can't possibly understand what it's like. When a patient comes into the Emergency Room we have to make life and death decisions on their care, within minutes of a person's arrival at times. 

When Curtis Ames entered the ER, he presented with symptoms of what at first resembled a simple flu.  Yes, his condition was complicated by dehydration and possible pneumonia, and his decision not to be admitted to the hospital as a patient, but, I had no reason to think it would become more then it was.  It's not normal for patients to spend the amount of time he did in the ER, and while it may have seemed to him that I was neglecting him, I was in fact keeping informed with what was happening on his treatment as I worked on patients who were in far worse condition then he was.

Sitting in that Courtroom, it was hard not to lose my temper as I listened to Curtis Ames and his lawyer twist the truth about what had happened during the time he was under my care.  Then, when I tried to explain the truth, I'm the one who is at fault for not simply answering the questions being asked of me.  What is so wrong with me wanting the jury to understand why things happened the way that they did?

When the case finally went to the jury I didn't know what to expect from them, looking at their faces that last time before they left for deliberations, all I could do was wonder who in their eyes was the more believable.  Curtis Ames had tried to influence their decision of course, that final day he'd arranged to have his ex-wife and children present, he needed them to see the family that had been impacted by my actions.  I chose to go the opposite direction, and I think if I'd had the choice I wouldn't have even been physically present, what was the point, I'd said what I'd done, nothing could change that no matter what took place in the courtroom. My fate was in their hands and all I could do was wait for their verdict.


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