Sunday, August 12, 2007

Prompt 23 A: Is it better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all? /Canon Muses

It was the feeling of emptiness that woke her.

"Luka?" Abby came awake fully as she rolled to her side, intending to curl up against her husband and instead finding only the coolness of long abandoned sheets.

"Luka?" She repeated his name as she pushed the coverlet aside and rose herself to go in search of him. Her first thought was that he must be with Joe, it wouldn't be the first time that their son's cries had woke one while failing to disturb the other.  As she eased the door open, expecting to find father and son together she instead found Joe still asleep in his crib.

"Luka?" It was hard not to keep the note of fear from her voice.  Ever since she'd seen him walk out that door with Curtis Ames she'd understood what it felt like to feel like she might lose him, and even knowing that Ames was dead, knowing he couldn't hurt them anymore, the fear still remained.  It was only as she came down the stairs and saw the trail of light that she could let go of her fear, to see past that and to what it was that had driven her husband from their bed.

"Luka?" She paused at the foot of the stairs as she called his name again, giving him a moment to realize he was no longer alone before approaching.

"Couldn't sleep?" As she walked up behind where he sat on the couch, and slid her arms around his neck, she realized that he held the picture of his first wife and daughter in his hand.

"No, did I wake you?" He made no attempt to conceal the small black and white, but, simply reached up to pat her hand.

"What's wrong, Luka?" After leaning in so she could kiss him, Abby rested her head against his.

"Do you know, Danijela and I would have celebrated our 21st anniversary this year."  His voice was quiet, the memories of a marriage long over still laying close to the surface. He fingered the frayed edges of the picture, aware that the smiles of the woman and young girl at one time stirred more feelings of sadness than the happiness they should.

"That's a long time." It was hard not to feel jealous of the feelings he felt for the young woman she'd never know, but she'd learned to allow him room for them, as hard as it was.

"Yeah...long time..."  His words grew quieter, and she knew his thoughts were back with those long gone.

"Good night, Luka." She brushed her lips across his cheek before releasing him,this was their time, and she'd leave him to them.





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