Saturday, May 5, 2007

"I used to think..."/Talking Muses

I used to think...I'd spend the rest of my life alone.  After all, I couldn't possibly reclaim the experience of holding my child in my arms, or find anyone who made me feel the joy of just being in their presence the way that Danijela did. 

How could I have been so wrong?

When you lose someone to war, or to a violent death it blinds you.  You become so obsessed with the act of how they were lost that you lose the ability to see anything beyond that, or at least it was that way with me for a very long time.  I can't say exactly what changed, or even why it did, only that it did, and because of that I was given a second chance at living, at loving.

This week marked a turning point in my life, the accomplishment of a goal I thought I would never again experience.  Slowly, over the last year Abby and I found our way back to each other, we discovered that the love we had shared was stronger then any differences we might have had in the past, and powerful enough to support the addition of a child. Only one final test remained and that barrier was crossed this week when Abby and I were wed. 

I think Danijela would approve

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