I Had A Dream
by Paul Revere and the Raiders
by N/A
I had a dream
I had a dream
Had myself a dream today
The same one
Havin' it most every day now
Since you been gone
Wake up in the mornin' and I find
You're not in my room
You're in my mind
Suddenly the sun has lost its shine
Baby, baby, baby
I had a dream
I had a dream
I had a dream
I had a dream
Had myself a dream tonight
The same one
Havin' it most every day now
Since you been gone
All alone upon a mountain high
Lookin' at your pictures in the sky
Turned around and looked into your eyes
Baby, baby, baby
I had a dream
I had a dream
How do you tell someone you made a mistake when they won't even talk to you? How do you tell them that the things you said weren't really the things you meant? That if there was a way you could take them back, or if you could undo it all you would without a moment's hesitation?
I don't know how we got to the place that we did. A place that would allow both of us to hurl words at the other that were meant to hurt far more than any physical blows would have. How do you begin to apologize for having issued insults only someone harboring a deep hatred of someone could have said?
If I harbor guilt at what I said to Abby, far worse was hearing what she had to say to me. I don't think until that night I realized that she felt jealousy toward Danijela and my feelings for her. I know we've talked about her, the life we had, and she has to realize that my wife's death couldn't change my feelings for her anymore then it could change those for my children. It doesn't mean I can't have similar feelings for her, and as angry as I felt, I knew in my heart the love I felt for her was still there.
I hate thinking about those first weeks when Abby barely looked at me, let alone spoke. If I entered a room she would find a reason to leave and perhaps even worse was seeing her relationship with Carter starting to develop. I didn't want to wish bad things on them, bad things on her, but how could I not if there was still hope for us?
It took time but Abby and I finally found a way to move past what had happened between us. I think we both realized that neither of us really wished the other any ill will, and the words we'd spoke were ones of anger and nothing more. As we found a way to forgive we also found our way back to our friendship and I think that in itself was the one thing I had missed the most. I want Abby to be happy, and if this is what it takes then I can live with it, and whatever happens from here happens, only time will tell if anything more comes of it. In the meantime, well, I can dream can't I?
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